![]() When it comes to tips on confidence, you've probably heard of the good old advice to "fake till you make it." This requires you to will yourself into it and pretend that you feel something you don't really feel. I'm not saying this is a bad advice as it may work for some people. But what if all this focusing on wanting to be more confident keeps you in the constant search of it? That search perpetuates the belief that you don't have it, because we only search for what we lack. I believe there is something more powerful and important than confidence, and that is desire. The key to being more confident is to stop focusing so hard on confidence (or lack thereof) and focus on something within you that already exists, and that is, desire. The strength of your desire will always trump the lack of confidence. Think about the times in your life you did something bold, scary, or uncertain. Did you always feel confident? Probably not! But you still did it. Why? Because your desire was so much stronger than your fear or insecurity that it didn’t matter if you did it scared. If you are in a place where you’re waiting around to feel more confident or you feel like you're holding yourself back because you think you need to be more confident fist, I invite to stop focusing on confidence and instead start focusing on your desire. Really think about what is it that you want and why you want it? Let that lead you. Really let yourself connect to the feeling of bringing that desire into reality. Want to read more posts about desire? Check out this post! A subtle way in which we give our power away is by imagining that others are thinking about us and judging us, and then making decisions based on these imagined judgments.
Most of the time, these imagined judgments only exist in our minds. We are the ones thinking them, not others! We never truly know what and if others are thinking about us, but let’s say they do. We have a choice whether to make decisions based on their opinions. We can separate their (potential or actual) opinions and check in with ourselves: “What do I think?” “Can I let them be wrong?” “Whose opinion really matters to me?” You can use your energy to manage and tolerate your life or you can use that energy to create the life you will love.
We were not given this life to constantly tolerate experiences that are meaningless and painful. Each one of has personal agency to create experiences that are meaningful, fulfilling, and exciting. If you don’t know where start, schedule a one off single session or reach out for a consultation! If you actively engage in personal growth and development, the chances are that you've heard of Abraham Hicks teachings and the law of attraction. I will share more about my experience with it in a separate post, but here are my favorite takeaways from this weekend's Law of Attraction workshop.
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May 2023
AuthorSladja Redner |