Reflections and self-inquiry are such powerful ways into our inner world. The key to an enriching reflection is curiosity. When we discover something we deem negative or bad about ourselves, many of us immediately start judging ourselves for it. If we anticipate that judgment may come up, we can notice it without engaging in it, and then observe it with curiosity. Keep this in mind when you do this exercise.
This reflection exercise is best when done in writing so you can save it and come back to it when you have time to be present with yourself. When you write things down, it forces you to be specific and clear about what it is that you’re thinking and it helps release it from your mind. While doing this reflection, you might be tempted to bypass any negative thoughts, feelings, and behaviors because you don’t want to “put it in the universe.” Not acknowledging something that is there, is not going to solve it - it will stay dormant and will be affecting you without you being aware of it. When going through the last section of “what would you like to believe instead?” write down as many new thoughts/beliefs as you’d like. Don’t be concerned with it not being realistic, but allow yourself to think of empowering, fulfilling, and powerful thoughts you haven’t had before. Take your time and really embody the feeling that the new belief would give you. You can journal on the last section every day. Having a morning routine that grounds you and setting an intention for yourself acts as fuel for the rest of your day. Don’t underestimate the power of small daily habits. You can fuel yourself each morning by writing down the new thoughts and bringing forth the feelings that go along with them.
For a while now, I felt called to work with individuals who are not necessarily struggling with mental health concerns or need healing, but instead are ready for their next growth opportunity. With honoring this passion of mine, I am excited to now offer online coaching in addition to psychotherapy!
How does coaching help? When we are so deeply fused with our thoughts and feelings (as most of us are), we cannot objectively see outside of ourselves. We believe the things that our mind creates, and oftentimes, this keeps us in the cycle of fear, self-loathing, anxiety, criticism, doubt, or overthinking. This is why coaching can be valuable - it helps us see and understand something that we can’t see ourselves because we are in it. Psychotherapy and coaching serve different needs at different points in one’s life. Therapy helps when someone is deep in their struggles and unable to find a way to untangle themselves from pain, regret, and suffering. If you feel like you live on autopilot, constantly repeating old behaviors and thought patterns that keep you stuck and deeply sad, or if you keep turning towards the past and need a place to process and make sense of how it is affecting you in the present moment, therapy can help. In my own therapy, I gained insight and awareness of the beliefs that were (subconsciously) guiding my actions, how and when I learned to believe them, and how they were hindering me from living the life I wanted for myself. Once you go through your own healing and growth, you may come to the point where you feel as if you could do, be, and have more. This may involve the process of discovering your true self and aligning your actions with your new beliefs and values. As you start striving forward, you will realize that, while you can’t change anything that happened in the past, you can create the life that is ahead of you. It is as if you start remembering that you are no longer a helpless child waiting to be saved and that it is up to you to take responsibility for your life. Coaching and personal development helped me understand my fears that kept coming up (and still do :)) any time I was moving closer to my goals and how they were trying to keep me in the same, old, comfortable place I so desperately wanted to leave behind. While I believe that continuous investment in my own personal and professional growth never truly ends, I’m excited and honored to be at the point where I have the tools to help others overcome their own limiting patterns and become the person they were meant to be. Who I work with? In my psychotherapy practice, I specialize in developmental trauma. I work with individuals who struggle to move on from the past and long to heal difficult childhood experiences and emotional neglect. This often shows up as “recreating” the same unwanted circumstances, self-sabotaging behaviors and thoughts, and emotional turmoil. Psychotherapy is often long term and a non-linear process of creating safety and understanding how behaviors that were once helpful, now create constriction and limitation in the present. In my coaching practice, I work with those who are eager to move onto that next step of inner transformation and change. I’m passionate about helping new - and first generation professionals overcome impostor syndrome and master their mindset so they can accomplish their goals and feel confident and deserving of an abundant, fulfilled life. Also, I love helping those wanting to create healthy habits and lifestyle changes that will support their wellbeing long term. These two areas combine my main passions, striving for professional and personal fulfillment. My mission in my own life is to keep becoming the best version of myself and keep creating the life I desire instead of recreating the one that I was born into. And that is what I want to help others achieve for themselves, whether it’s through psychotherapy or coaching. If you need support with getting started and reaching your goals, I would love to hear from you! Check out my Coaching page and reach out for a free consultation. Let’s get started! |
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May 2023
AuthorSladja Redner |