If you’re not empowered and excited by the fact that you have the freedom to change the course of your life, it’s because you’re scared.
 
Believing we are powerless can be easier than believing we are powerful.
 
Believing we are powerless places the potential to change onto circumstances outside of ourselves.
 
It requires others to behave in ways we want them to behave, to make us happy, to meet our needs…
 
Believing we are powerful brings the responsibility back to us and puts us fully in charge of our life, decisions, happiness, and actions.
 
It requires us to:
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• cultivate self-awareness
• detach from limiting stories
• wake up from childhood conditioning
• unlearn harmful beliefs about ourselves
• start prioritizing long-term gains instead of short-term pleasures
• set boundaries 

 
First, you have to be honest with yourself and meet your fears.
 

• What are you afraid of?
• Why?
• What would be possible if you stopped believing that?

When you bring your fears to the forefront of your consciousness, they don't have the power to drive you without your permission. Once you know you're making decisions out of fear, you have a choice to change something about that. 

When you realize that you indeed have a lot more choice in your life that you allowed yourself to have, your instinct might be to use that to beat yourself up, judge, and criticize yourself. This is completely useless. It will create more powerlessness and you will spend more time and energy on feeling bad. 

The point of awareness is never to use it against yourself, but to use it FOR yourself. Find a way to use the new gained knowledge to support your intentions and goals. 

Fears may be driving many behaviors and thoughts that prevent us from engaging in full living.
 
Oftentimes, we feel drawn to something that seeks expression in our life, but then, fear comes up and we interpret it as a sign that we should stay complacent.
 
Taking a leap towards something new will always bring a healthy dose of fear, because it is uncertain. Some ways in which fear shows up, are: confusion, perfectionism, avoidance, anger, overwhelm, etc.
 
Every time something scares us, it is a sign we are stretching ourselves out of our comfort zone, and every time we feel fear, it is showing us our next growth opportunity.
 
Questions to reflect on:

• Where is my fear pointing me towards right now?
  
• How do my fears stop me from growing into my most authentic self?
  
• Am I guided by fears or my purpose and meaning?

The moment we believe we know everything about ourselves, we stop learning and being curious. Self inquiry and curiosity are some of the most powerful tools for healing and growth, because they challenge our assumptions and rigid beliefs we hold about ourselves - often beliefs that are hurting us.
 
When we don’t question our disempowering beliefs, we mistake them for truths about who we really are. But these beliefs are never who we are, they are learned as a response to deep wounding.
 
No matter what kind of wounds have been inflicted upon us in the past, our wise, authentic, curious, and compassionate self is always there because THAT is who we are. It is merely overshadowed by the hurtful beliefs.
 
In the moments of pause, reflection, and curiosity, we are able to connect to a choice between living and responding from our wounds or our wisdom.

If your mind doesn’t have something specific to focus on (i.e. creativity, finding solutions, accomplishing a goal, etc.) it will focus on the familiar and comfortable. That’s what minds do. Familiar and comfortable often includes behaviors, thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and perceptions that directly go against what we most want for ourselves. Familiar and comfortable is most often not who we truly are and what we truly want, but it's what we learned at some point and then kept repeating, so it is easy and well known to us- it requires no effort. 
 
Important question to consider are:
 

• Does the familiar and comfortable serve your greatest good?

 

• Do your thoughts and behaviors support the life you truly want for yourself?

 
If the answers are “no,” then you can start by telling your mind what to focus on and how to be your servant, not your master.
 
Start by setting a daily intention for yourself.
 
I.e. “I want to make choices that support my health,” or “I want to be peaceful and calm.” Be clear and specific.
 
Create check ins with yourself throughout the day and notice when you’re being in ways that go against what you want for yourself.
 
Be gentle and nonjudgmental. Remember your intention. Think of all the ways in which your life would be different if you lived from that intention.
 
One moment at a time, you’re teaching your mind to work for you, not against you.