In moments of clarity, presence, and empowerment, we remember that we want more for ourselves. We don’t force this, it arises naturally. In those moments, we feel connected to a deep self-determination and desire to move forward. We become free from the limitations of our past, even if just for a moment.
In those moments, we feel free from shame and self-criticism. We stop defining ourselves by our limitations and instead allow ourselves to see a possibility of all we could be, do, and experience. We are in our true self.
When we’re in this place, we support ourselves to dream big, create, be inspired, curious, compassionate, energized, and connected. We may decide that the way we currently live our life doesn’t fit us anymore. Maybe we set big goals and make promises to ourselves.
Also naturally, we disconnect from those moments, and go back to our usual ways of living that feel familiar and comfortable, yet constricting. Our conditioned self returns.
Maybe it doesn’t yet feel safe to be in the moments of presence and connection for too long. In these moments our conditioned self may tell us that those desires we felt so connected to in one moment, aren’t possible, or that they don’t happen to people like us, or that we are broken, or that we will fail because we failed in the past.
Our conditioned self is fearful of change and growth.
It wants to bring us back to the state of fear and complacency. That voice may sound like a voice of reason and it may be too loud to ignore. That voice will fight for our limitations and will want us to rebel against the promises we made to ourselves when we felt empowered.
In these moments, we have to remind that voice:
I’m doing this for me.
I’m choosing what supports me.
My true desires are coming from self-love.
It is safe and healthy to want more.
One of the best ways to start the day is by journaling. It's a form of reflective and grounding practice that connects you deeper to the truth of who you are. But for many who struggle with overwhelm, stress, and worry, taking the time to slow down and journal feels difficult.
Interrupting the constant chatter in their mind may feel triggering and can bring up a lot of self-judgment. It may bring up thoughts like "I'm not good at it," "I don't have the time," I don't know what to write," "I've tried it in the past and in wasn't helpful," or "I have nothing to write about."
None of these thoughts are actually true, it's your mind coming up with ways to make it complicated and task oriented.
The key is to get started even if it's one sentence, a few bullet points, or even drawing. It can be anything you want it to be and there is no wrong way to do it as long as you're doing it.
What are the benefits of a journaling practice?
What to write?
Negative thoughts are not a problem unless we believe them.
On their own, they are powerless, unsubstantiated negative opinions and imaginations.
They gain their power when we give them power. When we hold onto them, collect evidence for them, entertain them, and identify with them.
Letting go of negative thoughts is difficult because we internalized them so early that they feel like facts, and giving them up feels like giving up the truth of who we are.
On the contrary, we often feel as if we need a permission to believe positive, empowering thoughts about ourselves.
They feel like a lie. We think we need a proof that great things about ourselves are true before we believe them.
But we don’t. What we allow in our mind is our responsibility. We get to decide.
And then when we decide, we need to keep clinging onto those intentional thoughts, entertain them, and collect evidence for them. That's how we make your mind a nice place to be.
1.Is this something I truly want?
Sometimes we set goals from a place of pressure or expectation, not from our true desires. If that’s the case, working towards your goals will be fraught with stress and overwhelm, instead of excitement and internal motivation to strive forward.
2.Do I really believe this is possible for me?
If a part of you doesn’t really believe you are capable or worthy of accomplishing this goal, you will subconsciously sabotage yourself to stay at the level you actually believe is realistic for you. Any time your will power is faced against a deep subconscious belief, your subconscious will win.
3.What are the stories I have around that goal?
We humans make meaning out of everything. As soon as you set a goal, all of your fears, objections, and expectations will come forward. Write them down. Notice the ones that feel disempowering and have a potential to move you further away from your goal.
4.How can I make this fun?
Goals you set are neutral until you make it either fun or stressful. You might be working on your goal for a while…how you want to feel while you work towards something
5.Why is this important to me?
Remember that you are doing this for you and be clear on why it matters to you. A meaningful reason “Why” is more likely to sustain you through the obstacles.