When we approach personal growth from a place of shame and self-judgment, we move further away from its intention and the whole process may start feeling like a self-punishment and a never-ending quest for “improvement.”
Here are a few things to remember:
1. Be patient - there is no place of arrival
2. Find a way to truly enjoy the process
3. Don’t measure your progress by where someone else is
4. A part of you may not want to change - try to understand why
5. You can get to the same place by motivating or criticizing yourself
Don’t wait for a major change.
Instead, focus on the small things that can be completed today and will make tomorrow easier.
Look around you and focus on what’s unfinished.
Just start with where you are.
When it comes to tips on confidence, you've probably heard of the good old advice to "fake till you make it."
This requires you to will yourself into it and pretend that you feel something you don't really feel. I'm not saying this is a bad advice as it may work for some people.
But what if all this focusing on wanting to be more confident keeps you in the constant search of it? That search perpetuates the belief that you don't have it, because we only search for what we lack.
I believe there is something more powerful and important than confidence, and that is desire.
The key to being more confident is to stop focusing so hard on confidence (or lack thereof) and focus on something within you that already exists, and that is, desire. The strength of your desire will always trump the lack of confidence.
Think about the times in your life you did something bold, scary, or uncertain. Did you always feel confident? Probably not! But you still did it. Why? Because your desire was so much stronger than your fear or insecurity that it didn’t matter if you did it scared.
If you are in a place where you’re waiting around to feel more confident or you feel like you're holding yourself back because you think you need to be more confident fist, I invite to stop focusing on confidence and instead start focusing on your desire.
Really think about what is it that you want and why you want it?
Let that lead you. Really let yourself connect to the feeling of bringing that desire into reality.
Want to read more posts about desire? Check out this post!
If you actively engage in personal growth and development, the chances are that you've heard of Abraham Hicks teachings and the law of attraction. I will share more about my experience with it in a separate post, but here are my favorite takeaways from this weekend's Law of Attraction workshop.