How to Set Goals You Can Actually Achieve
Start by setting experiments, not outcomes.
Most people think they’re setting goals when they say things like:
I want to make more money.
I want to feel happier.
I want to grow my business.
I want to be more confident.
But those aren’t actually goals. They’re outcomes. They’re the result of something else happening.
There’s nothing wrong with having outcomes you want. They can be clarifying and can point you in a specific direction. But when we treat outcomes as goals, we quietly set ourselves up for frustration, because outcomes aren’t fully within our control.
What is within your control is how you show up, what you practice, what you try, and what you’re willing to do differently. What is within your control are the things you can do to make the desired outcome likely to happen.
That’s where real goals live.
A different way to think about goals
A goal isn’t what you want to happen, it’s what you’re willing to do. It’s an action, a practice, or an experiment - something you can actually show up for, regardless of how things turn out.
For example:
Outcome: I want to feel less stuck.
Goal: I will spend 10 minutes, three times a week, exploring what I’m avoiding instead of trying to fix it.
Outcome: I want more meaningful work.
Goal: I will have one curious conversation a month with someone whose work intrigues me.
Outcome: I want to feel more grounded this year.
Goal: I will build a simple morning ritual that helps me arrive in my body before checking my phone.
Notice the difference and the shift it creates. The goal becomes a part of a realistic process. You’re no longer waiting for motivation or certainty - you’re engaging with the process.
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Ask a better question
Instead of asking: What do I want to achieve this year?
Try asking: What am I willing to do differently?
Or:
What am I willing to experiment with?
How am I willing to show up when it’s uncomfortable or unclear?
What kind of energy do I want to bring into the process?
How do I want to feel while I’m moving toward this - not just when I “get there”?
Goals as experiments, not contracts
When you hold goals too tightly, they turn into demands: This has to work. I have to get this right. But when goals are framed as experiments, they become invitations: Let’s see what happens if I try this.
You’re not promising an outcome. You’re committing to participation and when you commit to participation the measure of success changes. Whether you accomplish the result becomes less relevant, and that’s a good thing because it’s not something you control anyways. And paradoxically, that often increases your chances of getting where you want to go - because you’re more present, more responsive, and less locked into one rigid path.
A gentle reframe for the year ahead
You can still have desires. You can still want more, different, better, just don’t confuse the destination with the work.
Let your outcomes you desire guide you - but let your goals be actions you can stand behind, even if the path winds, changes, or surprises you.
That’s setting goals that actually meet you where you are and move you forward from there.