Anything Can Look Easy When Others are Doing it

“It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself in a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.”

- Theodore Rosevelt

When we look at people who are good at something we’re working toward, it’s almost reflexive to say, “Well, it’s easier for her because…” or “He had help from…” We simplify their process to soothe ourselves. If we convince ourselves that things come easily to others, it becomes easier to give up or to never try in the first place.

But this is a narrow minded perspective that doesn’t include nuance and understanding that mastering anything requires dedication, consistency, time, and effort.

Almost anything can appear easy when we’re watching someone do it. What we see is usually a polished snapshot or the end result, not the long path of effort, discipline, and quiet, unglamorous choices that made it possible.

When we downplay other people’s efforts, we unintentionally create an unrealistic standard for ourselves.

We start believing that most things should be easy, and when they inevitably become difficult, we misinterpret the discomfort as a sign to quit instead of a normal part of growth. Or we place ourselves a victim of our circumstances and we take away our choices to even attempt change. The truth is that most worthwhile things require effort, intentional prioritizing, and a willingness to push our growth edges. They ask us to act differently than we’re used to.

How I Realized That Effort Isn’t Accidental

The first time I started thinking about this was in 2015, when I decided to ditch smoking and start working out. I began building new habits from scratch and it wasn’t until I experienced it myself—the time, the discomfort, the internal negotiation—that I truly understood the gap between observing something and doing it. Until then, I would look at people who seem to effortlessly be in “shape” and think it’s easy for them. I haven’t considered that, they too, started from scratch at some point and had to build the habits they have now. What I didn’t see was them making consistent choices, prioritizing movement, and carving out time for habits that mattered to them.

What looked easy from the outside was the result of dozens, maybe hundreds, of small decisions no one ever sees. So many things that seem effortless are actually built on invisible effort.

The Myth of Overnight Success

“Overnight success” doesn’t exist. Things look easy right up until the moment we attempt them ourselves. I wonder if minimizing other people’s effort is a kind of self-protective mechanism, an unconscious way of excusing ourselves from trying so we don’t have to face the possibility of falling short.

How many things that appear simple, natural, or effortless actually require sustained dedication, focus, and commitment—effort that’s simply hidden behind the final result?

Meaningful vs. Misaligned Effort

I do believe that all worthwhile things require effort, but not all effort is created equal. There is a difference between meaningful effort and the kind of forcing that goes against our true path. Some effort energizes us—it stretches us in ways that feel aligned, even if it’s challenging. Other forms of effort feel flat or empty because they’re rooted in roles we’ve inherited or expectations that were never truly ours.

Maybe “meaningless” isn’t the perfect word, but unfulfilling effort is real. It’s the kind that produces achievements that look good externally but feel hollow internally.

Negotiating The Difficulty

It might be a human tendency to rationalize and negotiate with difficulties. To assume it must be easier for others. To forget how much practice, vulnerability, and persistence lives beneath the surface of anything we admire.

But once we understand the reality of effort, not as a punishment, but as the natural cost of anything worthwhile, we give ourselves permission to stay in the process, to tolerate the discomfort, and to build something meaningful one choice at a time.