Ah, the excitement of it all…. New ideas, running high on all the possibilities and options, feeling empowered and fearless, as if nothing can stop you.
But then you come across your first roadblock and that little voice of self-doubt that was quiet for a while, starts taking up space. At the beginning you manage to ignore it, but every time things don’t go exactly as you planned, it becomes louder and louder. You might look around to make sure you’re hearing it correctly and indeed- all you can find is the “evidence” pointing towards failure and signs that what you want isn’t possible.
Fear, judgment, and self-doubt wants you to be complacent.
We human beings always want to take the easiest, most comfortable route, so when we come across that first roadblock that seems impossible to overcome, we start negotiating with that fear and allow it to control our actions. The fact that you are currently struggling, or that you are scared doesn’t mean you need to give up and change the course of your path. It simply means that you need to look deeper within and find the strength, desire, dream, and faith that made you believe that this is the right choice. That intrinsic desire is not extinguished when you’re fearful. You just can’t hear it underneath all that noise of self-doubt and judgment. But it is there, and it is alive!
Fear will not go away on its own.
It is there to remind you that what you’re doing (and/or wanting) is new and unknown territory. You may have heard the phrase, “what you resist – persists,” so trying to suppress it will surely backfire. It will be present every time you’re doing something that is not familiar, so the things you want to do, you will have to do WHILE scared.
Feelings are always there to guide and inform us.
Instead of judging and pushing away your experience, try to welcome it. Notice it, name it, accept it, make space for it, be curious as to why it needs your attention so badly. You can do all this by taking a few moments to ask yourself:
Sit with these questions and allow the answers to come freely. Oftentimes, half of our struggle is in us resisting experiences that we deem negative and unacceptable. Once we accept that they are a part of us, they don’t compete for our attention so much, and we’re able to focus our efforts and intention elsewhere. You might notice that the more you welcome those unwanted feelings and simultaneously do the things that are uneasy, your comfort zone will expand, and you will be able to take on more challenges with certainty and trust in yourself.
*DISCLAMER* Blog posts are created with a goal of sharing my personal reflections as well as practical tools and tips to create relief and increase your wellbeing. Please note that, while I hope that information I share is going to be helpful, it is not meant to be a substitute for therapy.