On Being Yourself

You’re not struggling to “be yourself.” You’re struggling because you believe you need to be someone else.

Being ourselves becomes difficult when we:

• Believe that who we genuinely are is not lovable or good enough
• Contort ourselves into the person we think we should be
• Shrink all of our humanity and complexity into one “flaw”
• Fear rejection if we fully show ourselves
• Criticize and shame ourselves for who we are.
• Believe having needs is needy
• Pressure ourselves to be different

 
The being part is easy. What’s difficult are the internal pressures and painful stories we tell ourselves.
 
Next time you think you don’t know how to be yourself, notice:

• What kinds of constrictions and pressures you’re putting on yourself
• What are you afraid would happen if you let yourself be?
• What are you telling yourself in that moment?

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